Scranton vs. Anaheim

Contrary to popular opinion, the release of Paris Hilton (which Fox News dubbed "The Liberation of Paris" for yuks) is not the most pressing cultural topic of the day, nor is the homicide-suicide of wrestling superstar Chris Benoit worth studying. There are some recent developments in Hollywood that require our attention.

Recently I discovered that John Krasinski is interested in playing Fletch in the upcoming movie, Fletch Won. Barring Chevy Chase's return, I'd say that's a good call. If you've been living under a rock, Krasinski plays Jim Halpert on the NBC sitcom The Office. I couldn't imagine anyone better myself.

So today I made my way over to the IMDb entry for Fletch Won and what do I find except some actor rumored to portray Fletch whose name isn't Jim Halpert.

Except this isn't just any would-be actor. It's Joshua Jackson.

Maybe you know him as Charlie Conway. Minneapolis, Minnesota.

I thought that Halpert would get in with no competition. I thought wrong. Jim and Charlie, while they play completely different games, will be tough competitors. Jim may be able to pull pranks on Dwight and undermine Dunder-Mifflin's administrative ethos, but is that going to get him past Charlie's ability to work with Coach Bombay and his teammates? Can Jim's blank stare pierce Charlie's belief in the mantra, "Ducks fly together"?

In short, will Charlie's triple dekes get him past Jim's vaunted comedic ability? Or will Halpert rewrite history-as-we-know-it and block Charlie's climactic penalty success?

The Office vs. The Mighty Ducks. Three seasons, three movies. An epic actor versus another epic actor. Count on Cerberus to continue the coverage.